Police Officer: Okay. May I see your driver’s license please?
Driver: What? Did I do anything wrong?
Police Officer: License, please. And your car registration.
Driver: Oh, yeah. It’s, uh, somewhere here in the glove compartment. Yeah, here it is.
Police Officer: Sir, did you realize you were speeding in a school zone?
Driver: What? No, I didn’t. That’s probably because my odometer is broken, I . . . I mean, malfunctioning.
Police Officer: Yes, you were going 50 miles per hour in a 20 miles per hour zone. And [What?] AND, you failed to come to a complete stop at the intersection back there.
Driver: Rolling stops don’t count?
Police Officer: And, one of your brake lights is out, [Huh?] and you’re not wearing a seat belt, AND your driver’s license expired six months ago.
Driver: And your name is . . . Officer Smith? [Yeah.] Hey, are you related to the Smiths in town? [Well . . .] My wife’s cousin’s husband (I think his name is Fred) works for the police department here. Or was that the fire department. Anyway, I thought you might be good pals, and you know . . .
Police Officer: Hey, are you trying to influence an officer? I could have this car impounded right here because of these infractions.
Driver: No, of course not.
Police Officer: Okay, then. Here’s your ticket. You can either appear in court to pay the fine or mail it in. And have a nice day.
Driver: [Do] you take cash?