Man: Hello.
Telemarketer: Good evening, Sir. Is this Mr. Charles Philips?
Man: Yes, it is.
Telemarketer: Well, Mr. Phillips. This evening, I’m calling to offer you a special discount on . . .
Man: Ah, no, let me guess. You want to offer me a subscription to the newspaper or a great deal on airfare to Hawaii, right? [Well . . .] Or, you want to offer me an unbelievable bargain on flamenco dance lessons.
Telemarketer: No, no, actually . . . Mr. Jones. [Huh?] Oh, sorry. That was the last guy. [Ah, great.] Uh, we want to offer you a free trial membership to our sports club downtown at the introductory price of $39.95 . . .
Man: Thirty-nine ninety-five?!? I thought you said free! Uh, listen. I’m not interested.
Telemarketer: Well, it includes unlimited access to all our facilities, including the gym, weight room, racquetball courts, and swimming pool.
Man: Again, I’m not interested. I have my own fitness program I do around the house anyway.
Telemarketer: Well, this is a once-in-a-lifetime deal.
Man: Nah. Like I said, I’ll pass this time. And please put me on your “don’t call” list.
Telemarketer: Okay. It’ll take between four and six months before your name will be removed from our database. [Months?!?] You might be called by another representative during that time.
Man: Ah, man. Ah, great.
Telemarketer: Have a nice evening, Mr. Williams.
Man: Ah, man.