Police Officer: Okay. May I see your driver's license please?
Driver: What? Did I do anything wrong?
Police Officer: License, please. And your car registration.
Driver: Oh, yeah. It's here somewhere in the glove compartment. Yeah, here it is.
Police Officer: Sir, did you realize you were speeding in a school zone?
Driver: What? No, I didn't, but that's probably because my odometer is broken, I mean, malfunctioning.
Police Officer: Yes, you were going 50 miles per hour in a 20 miles per hour zone. And [What?] AND, you failed to come to a complete stop at the intersection back there.
Driver: Rolling stops don't count?
Police Officer: And, one of your break lights is out, [Huh?], you're not wearing a seat belt, AND your driver's license expired six months ago.
Driver: And your name is . . . . Officer Smith? Hey, are you related to the Smiths in town? My wife's cousin's husband (I think his name is Fred) works for the police department here. Or was that the fire department. Anyway, I thought you might be good pals, and you know . . .
Police Officer: Hey, are you trying to influence an officer? I could have this car impounded right now because of these infractions.
Driver: No, of course not.
Police Officer: Okay, then. Here's your ticket. You can either appear in court to pay the fine or mail it in. Have a nice day.
Driver: Do you take cash?